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Everything I Didn’t Delete. In order.
Apr 10, 2025 : 1. Reluctant Introduction None of this is real. Don’t read too much into it. Please. Keep telling myself this is fiction. Only thoughts. Some things I want to forget. Some I …
Apr 12, 2025 : 2. Double Denim Descent Don’t look at me Where to start? I’m British. So a fry-up seems a safe bet. Could’ve done something more profound to celebrate my 30th. Booked an …
Apr 14, 2025 : 3. Woke to the Smell of Fish Fingers Everything was off. My alarm didn’t go off this morning. The unbranded wireless charger work got me for my birthday was a charred lump on the floor. …
Apr 15, 2025 : 4. Acceptable Components of a Fry-Up Breakfast is serious. People are wrong. I mentioned my birthday fry-up at work. Shouldn’t have. It sparked a full-blown argument. Some unhinged …
Apr 16, 2025 : 5. The Man with the Mushroom I looked away like it hadn’t happened. Had to go to the shops after work. No food, no coffee, and the dog next door is gearing up for another …
Apr 21, 2025 : 6. Unexpected Victory Bode my time. Waited. Pounced. A hero. Went to see a film yesterday. Changed my mind at the door. Was about to head home, but then I saw the new …
Apr 22, 2025 : 7. Report Done. Don’t Fucking Ask Me About It. Nothing. Tuesday. First day back in the office after my heroic long weekend. Spent most of the day blinking at my screen. Somehow got the report done. …
Apr 24, 2025 : -78. The Stranger in My Office Who are you? Why are you here? When I got to work, a stranger was sitting in my office. Coat on the chair. Half-drank coffee mug on display. It felt …
Apr 27, 2025 : 8. Right Day, Wrong Movie Jolon Fairweather’s day off. It’s Sunday, and a lot has happened since I last wrote. On Wednesday, I went to work. On Thursday, I did the same. …
Apr 29, 2025 : X. How to Write a Perfect Medium Post (Selling Your Soul to the Algorithm) Author note: I edited the previous version for accuracy. Kept the coffee. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. …
May 1, 2025 : 9. Today, I Said Nothing at Work I not work proper. Spent most of the day writing a Slack message. Nothing important. Just a reply in a thread no one’s touched since Monday. First, I …
May 3, 2025 : 10. What the Ceiling Says at 3am Staring up. Not winning. Can’t sleep. Again. I’m lying here staring at the ceiling like we are having an argument. Don’t think I’m winning. Buying …
May 4, 2025 : -71. Shameful Trip to the Printer I could smell the stranger. I’d gone to the director’s floor for a presentation. These walls hadn’t heard a joke in years. — My stomach dropped. The …
May 5, 2025 : 11. The Hole Behind the Bin Can’t stop thinking about it. No alarm today. Bank holiday. Woke around nine and dragged myself to the kitchen. Last night’s takeaway cartons were …
May 6, 2025 : 12. A Formal Nothing to Worry About Knew I‘d cop it when I stopped for coffee. Got to work late again. Knew I was pushing it when I stopped for a coffee, but the thought of sitting at my …
May 7, 2025 : 13. Half Dressed for Success Nearly winning. I’ve awoken with a new sense of purpose. Full of someone else’s joie de vivre, maybe. There are plenty of other jobs. Ones I can …
May 8, 2025 : 14. How Do You Know You’re Alive? The man with no pulse. Applied for three jobs before getting out of bed. One mentioned “stakeholder mapping,” which sounds a bit like urban hunting. …
May 9, 2025 : Handcrafting the Perfect Sandwich Includes notes on structure, seasoning, and technique. Begin by clearing a suitable area for your prep. Not on top of the glass hob. A proper space …
May 9, 2025 : -68. She Deserved My Finger Wag She stole my cactus. I caught her eye. I saw her in Pret. Not by chance. The queue was long, but I found my way behind her. Her faint, floral lift …
May 11, 2025 : 15. Trying to Be the Best Version of Myself Nothing I do feels right. Spent all weekend reworking my CV. Nothing I added felt right. Scrapped it all. Made the font bigger. Improved my education …
May 13, 2025 : 16. Maybe She Didn’t Like My Meal Deal She blinked like I wasn’t there. Woke at 4:12. Listened to the barking. Got to work early. Logged in. A motivational GIF had been pasted into the …
May 15, 2025 : 17. Might Need a Second Biscuit A story of stolen digestives, hope, and HR. There’s a Post-it on the fridge: PLEASE DO NOT EAT OTHER PEOPLE’S BISCUITS No smiley face. Currently …
May 15, 2025 : War in The Pantry An epic 55-word tale of office rivalry. Her chocolate digestives were gone. “I labelled them,” she said. “I saw,” he replied. “Why are you eating …
May 17, 2025 : 18. Drunk and Red Hot with Joy Popped out for two pints. Failed. Only meant to have a couple. Popped into the pub near the station. Two pints. Three tops. To take the edge off the …
May 17, 2025 : -61. The Stranger Knows My Name She looked down. Then back at me. Wasn’t planning to go to the work do. Another sycophantic schmoozefest with corporate clients. But the invite said …
May 18, 2025 : 19. Only Bones Remain Hunted by a dog I’ve never seen. Still in bed. Day two. Can’t move my elbow. Watched every episode of America’s Sweethearts. Go DCC. Those girls are …
May 19, 2025 : Most Dreadful Thing Flash Fiction Prompt #5 | May 2025 Tide was low, the sea strained under a bruised sky. His map was marked only with a cross. The trail had narrowed, …
May 19, 2025 : -152. A Bit on the Side Nothing Happened. Everything was round. Booked the trip on a whim. Nine days in Side, Turkey. All-inclusive. I wanted sun, silence. A break. Hoped it …
May 20, 2025 : 20. No One Clapped Biscuit failure. Didn’t sleep again. Mind racing. Chest tight. Heart pounding. Might be all the biscuits. Need to be healthier. Chopped half a banana …
May 21, 2025 : 21. The Best Day of My Life Do people feel like this all the time? No barking last night. No scratching. No whining. Silence. Real silence. And sleep. Real sleep. Woke up …
May 22, 2025 : 22. Shirt, Clean, Perturbing My reflection smiled at me. Slept right through again. Woke up alert, but with stiff legs. A good pain. Will run further next time. The kitchen still …
May 22, 2025 : #Hashtag What’s a Tick Tock? No Platform. No Presence. No Problem. My first tick-tock taught me how to tell the time. I’ve never hashtagged anything on purpose. So, I was …
May 23, 2025 : 23. Golden Dog I’m doing all the things that end in king tonight. Had a good week. Everything is going my way. About time Am sat in one of my old haunts. On my …
May 25, 2025 : 24. It’s Back Fucking Fuck. next | previous
May 26, 2025 : X. Eight Reasons Dogs Bark (And What They Might Be Trying to Tell You) Dogs bark for all kinds of reasons. Some are obvious, like fear, boredom, and excitement. Others are less clear, but they’re never meaningless. If you …
May 26, 2025 : 11. The Hole Behind the Bin Still can’t stop thinking about it. No alarm today. Bank holiday. Woke around nine and dragged myself to the kitchen. Last night’s takeaway cartons …
May 27, 2025 : 26. Princess I expected snarling. Growling. Cerberus. But it had a pink bow. Saw the neighbour in the corridor. With the dog. Wasn’t planning to say anything, but …
May 28, 2025 : He Called Himself The Big Dog A THROWAWAY ACT, NOW AN ETERNAL JUDGEMENT It was neat here. Little gravel paths and tiny stone benches. Pretty, for a field of rotted dead. Forgotten …
May 29, 2025 : 27. The Garamond Gospel: My Interview Blueprint Everything is annotated. My big interview is in the morning. 9 am. Ironed a shirt already. Shaved. Cut my nails. Clipped a rogue eyebrow hair. Set …
May 30, 2025 : 28. It Places the Cup on the Corner I watched them all scurry around. Had a good night’s sleep. A great morning, too. Thought about going for another run. Will do it tomorrow. Picked up …
Jun 2, 2025 : 29. Does He Really Know What Happened? How could he? He wasn’t there. Been replaying the interview. Going over the things I said. The way I smiled while talking. Think I sounded nervous. …
Jun 5, 2025 : Unreliable Narrator Hi, I’m Jolon. I’ve been writing down what happened. The way I want to remember it. Hello, world. #diary
Jun 5, 2025 : Ribbit. Ignore me. I’m just holding the frog.
Jun 5, 2025 : It Really Is the Most Dreadful Fucking Thing What a load of bollocks. Ignore. Don’t feel like doing any work. Reread my Medium posts. Don’t care for them. 1. Reluctant Introduction Fucking idiot. …
Jun 6, 2025 : 31. I’m Back Finally got the call. “We loved speaking to you last week”. Knew it. I’m going to their office on Tuesday. Meet the team. Probably has cucumber water …
Jun 9, 2025 : 32. One More Day I’ve already won. I’m sure. Woke feeling ready. Lay there a while. Planning my new life. Interview tomorrow. Not nervous. Sharp. Composed. Made toast. …
Jun 10, 2025 : 33. S.H.I.N.E. Prepared. Poised. Perfect. Interview day. Up at 3. No point trying to sleep. Picked up my prep notes. Reread them again as the kettle boiled. Had a …
Jun 11, 2025 : -53. The Distance Between Us An Unspoken Goodbye Mist sat low over the surface, thinning and folding. She was ahead of me. Always by a few steps. My role was to follow. Neither of …
Jun 13, 2025 : 34. My To-Do List Princess needs a permanent solution. Watched the boss attempt to reverse-park this morning. Four times! Eventually, he gave up and went in forwards. …