X. How to Write a Perfect Medium Post (Selling Your Soul to the Algorithm)
Author note: I edited the previous version for accuracy. Kept the coffee.
Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening hook. Opening
Clickbait Anecdote
Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait clicky Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote.
Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote.
Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. Clickbait Anecdote. yes.
Internal Monologue
Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Slack. Thoughts.
Thoughts. My thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts.Thoughts. Thoughts. Skegness. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts.
Coffee
Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. You must mention fucking coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.
Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Perfect Sandwich. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee. Coffee.
Misdirect
Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. The. Hole. Woof. Woof. Woof. Stranger. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Dreadful. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof.WOOf woof. woof.
Epic Conclusion
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
This sentence probably makes the post exactly six hundred words (not including the title).