What a load of bollocks. Ignore.

Don’t feel like doing any work. Reread my Medium posts. Don’t care for them.

1. Reluctant Introduction

Fucking idiot. It’s not a mystery. It’s a dumb twat trying too hard not to try too hard.

2/10

23. Golden Dog

Shite.

1/10

5. The Man with the Mushroom

Nothing. Dreadful nonsense. I shop at Lidl. They don’t have a cocking rotisserie.

1/10

Most Dreadful Thing

Flash fiction. Too close to the truth. People liked it.

3/10

11. The Hole Behind the Bin V1

No.

1/10

-78. The Stranger in My Office

Perfect

10/10

16. Maybe She Didn’t Like My Meal Deal

Terrible. Inflated score in defence of salt and vinegar Hula Hoops.

6/10

30. What Hugh Doesn’t Know

Jesus Fucking Christ.

Deleted.

X. How to Write the Perfect Medium Post

Clickbait. HATE IT. Can’t delete. Most viewed. Fuck you. Edited.

0/10

27. The Garamond Gospel

Waste of time. When will they fucking email me?

1/10

He Called Himself The Big Dog

Think about this guy at least twice a day.

4/10

The other ones are worse.

Can’t believe this one was published. Fuck off.